How To Guide: Become a Marketing Douche
Every successful marketer knows that being good at what you do is simply not enough. There are certain things every person in the marketing field should know about when it comes to going above and beyond the call of duty.
1. Hair Gel
The header says everything. Any marketer worth his weight in hair gel, uses his weight in hair gel every morning. Having rock solid hair can say a lot to your clients. It really shows them that you put a lot of effort into what you care about, and what you care about is A. Looking Good, and B. Marketing. You want clients to know that you’re not sloppy with your hair or their product.
2. Let Everyone Know How Impressive You Are
A major issue with many aspiring marketers today is that they simply don’t do a good enough job at telling everyone how awesome they are. Networking is a great way to meet new clients and business partners. Upon first meeting someone, the best way to make meaningful contacts is to spell out every accomplishment you’ve had since 5th grade.
3. Social Media Spam
I don’t know if you’ve heard or not, but Facebook and the social networking 2.0 scene is BOOMING. And guess what the secret weapon for your marketing mix is – you guessed it – social media marketing. Promoting a brand with social media is genius, and it’s just about to catch on. Be sure you know how to use Facebook and make several events and groups for your client, and send as many invitations to your target market as possible. These invitations and reminders are very noticeable and difficult to avoid, perfect for promoting your product. It doesn’t matter if you’re advertising industrial washing machines or retirement homes, social media can help every marketer be more effective.
4. Buzz Words
Not sure what “Web 2.0″ means? Confused when people start talking about “tweets”? Don’t let that be you, because it’s buzz words like these that allow you to become an expert in the marketing field. Nothing makes you sound more credible than using vague, ill defined words that you really don’t understand. Remember that your favorite color is Green, and that you helped develop the Social Internets.